I am feeling a little sentimental or something that I cant describe.  Jim is not doing well at all, and there is nothing I can do personally to make him better.  He is in constant pain, although he has all the pain medicines and pain patches that can be prescribed for him.  He is dizzy, and every time he stands up, he says he feels like his legs are going to fall under him.  He sat in his recliner all day yesterday and slept.  I finally woke him at 3 and asked if he would like to get out and ride a little.  He did, and we did, but it took a long time for him to get to the car. 

I started cooking supper when we got back and nothing would do him but to help, so he sat at the table and peeled the potatoes for me.  He says he is hungry, but when we finally get it all on the table, he eats very little.

I never thought I would get to this point in life.  I guess I just thought I would go on being younger, able to go and do what I wanted to, and Jim would be that way too.  Life goes on right under your eyes.

I think part of his feelings are because he finally sold his company last week, sold one of his big trucks this week, went to the bank and closed his company accounts.....things pertaining to work, and he now realizes that it is over for him.  Depression has set in.

We took care of his Mother who had Alzheimer's, and then we took care of his Dad who lived a long life, and now it has come to us.  My Mom died when I was 34 and my Dad wasn't in my life.  I took care of my only living relative, an Aunt, who also had dementia, until her death.  I am wondering who is going to take care of the one of us that is finally left.  Our children all have very full, active lives and really don't have the time to stop and take care of two elderly people.

All my life I heard the saying, 'the child becomes the parent', so I guess that has really become true.  I don't like it, but with God's help, I will get through it.  Prayers appreciated.